You never have to worry about what to say. Nobody knows what to say. Most anything works that conveys a sincere feeling of understanding. And just being there, or in your case, knowing you are there. What doesn’t really help me is the usual platitudes we use at times like this. Like…you know you loved him and he loved you and he had a wonderful life with you. For me it makes it worse because it reinforces the fact that that love is gone and that wonderful life is over and it’s not coming back…And like now I cry every time someone says that to me. We all mean well and it is tough to find words to comfort those we care about. But most any empathic words will do. Anything that says I feel for you and what you are going through. And our connection goes beyond words. I know you are there, I know you feel for me and that alone will help me get through this. Someday we will talk about Barney and smile and say how cute he was. Just not today.
