The little guy slid downhill pretty fast. At first the vet thought he just had an upset stomach and gave me some meds. That was last Thursday. But when he continued to not eat, I saw the vet on Saturday. They ran some blood tests and in the words of the vet, his liver was on fire. If it was the cancer, there was nothing they could do. But maybe it was an infection and all they could do was put him in the hospital and stick a bunch of tubes in him. She asked me if I wanted to do down that rabbit hole? I said no, so she sent me home with some pain meds and a list of vets who come to your home and put your pet to sleep. My vet said they even make weekend appointments. I couldn’t do that Saturday and was going to put it off until today, Monday. But Sunday afternoon I got a quick burst of courage and called the first one and left a message. She called back within 30 minutes. Her kind voice made me lose it and I barely got thru the call. Her first appropriate opening was for Wednesday. I wanted to try for Monday. So, I made an appointment for Wednesday and said I would continue to look for a Monday appointment. I chose another service and went to their website. They are national company with vets around the country, and their website was much more high tech. Select from several vets, pick a day, pick a time and pick the services you wanted. Much more impersonal, but truly beneficial. No having to cry to a person on the other end of the phone. The vet came today at 1:00. And he was really amazing and very comforting. He explained the process, what to expect and was very respectful, and personable too. I held Barney until his little heart stopped beating. He’s gone, the vet said. I am just numb now. The hard part is over. The sun is still shining, I am still standing, and life will go on. It’s just hurting right now and only time will make it go away.
